Ingredients:
one young man
one empty honey jar
1/3 cup heavy whipping cream
serves: 20
preparation time: varies
[This is a perfect place for the German “man nehme,” for which the best translation I can come up with is that it’s a cross between “take” and “one taketh,” — it’s instructional, slightly formal and archaic, but totally usable. And impersonal. Like “man sieht sich,” which means literally “one sees each other,” and is the kind of thing you say to someone whom you’re either actually going to see again in the natural course of things, or whose company you do not enjoy enough to seek it out in any active way. And this tension makes it hilarious (or I think it does).]
So, then: Man nehme the young man. This works best if you are on easy speaking terms with the young man. If you are not, take steps. If you are, pour the cream into the jar, which should have bits of honey left in it (if it is clean, add a teaspoon of something sweet). Hand the jar to the young man, and promise him pumpkin pie with whipped cream if he shakes the jar well. Do not specify how long he should shake it.
Now ask him a question about his favorite childhood movie (any question will do).
Pumpkin Pie with Whipped Cream
Acquire a slice of pumpkin pie. Remove the butter from the jar and store it. Repeat the above, minus the question about the movie, and while watching the jar closely. Reclaim the jar after its contents thicken but before they turn golden.